Christmas 1990

I'm out the door at 7 pm, the family are blissfully asleep in a haze of QC, Turkey sarnies and 2nd hand sprout fumes. Waiting for the Christmas specials to come on the telly. I'm picked up by Batesy in his shed of a mini, in the back there's Merchant and Cooper. Fuck me this is going to be a messy head fuck of a night. Those two are the North Leeds equivalent of the Good Doctor and his Attorney, experts in the art of getting fucked on anything they can get there hands on. Tonights menu consists of a quarter of Double zero and a healthy sheet of purple ohms. Merch is chuckling to himself as he has a shallow fruit box on his knee with a box of red large rizzla packets. "Merry Xmas cuz, tonights the night we roll the camberwell carrot"

Down to Scottish Steve's we go. Merry fucking Xmas a house party in Gipton awaits. All the wreck heads are there; Saddler, Steve, Little Chris, Batesy, Merch and Cooper (they come as a pair), Tris, Barty and Mad Daz. Daz had an incident with red windowpanes which ended up with him running down Scott Hall Road bollock naked pursued by 6 coppers hence the mad moniker. Suffice to say he's not that interested in the consumption of tabs and to be honest we agree with him. Fucked if I want to see him fighting naked with coppers anytime again in the near or distant future.

Needless to say Scottish Steve is hammered but is as always the genial host. A total gent and a lovely easy going slight fella he had some gruesome scars and even more gruesome tales of growing up in some shit hole in Glasgow. Gipton for him was like Beverley Hills.

The tunes are banging out, we're all arguing over the cd player but eventually Merch focuses our attention on the construction of the biggest spliff ever built this side of Camberwell. 6 of us are furiously sticking papers together while Merch empties the contents of 20 Regal into a bowl whilst burning and crumbling the beige powdery gear.

The acid is kicking in......

Anon.